September 2011
1 post
Russian French Spy
So for a while there’s been this Russian French guy that drops by now and then to exchange currencies. From dollars to nam dollars. And I wondered for a while why he doesn’t speak to me, only to find out later that he doesn’t speak English at all.
So yesterday, when I bumped into him in the street, I said hi with a hug, and I think he was really taken aback, it was SUCH an...
June 2011
1 post
He sents me an email
The caption of the email says: Handsome?
Inside were three attachments of his wedding shoot, his personal pictures, not the ones with his wife. What’s he implying? Why the fuck is he sending me this?
My heart bleeds
May 2011
1 post
Twitch
So my left eye has been twitching this evening, past 6 this evening.
Mom says that left eye twitch is a bad omen.
Then around 7ish, my right eye twitched too!!!!
ugh :(
April 2011
8 posts
Bunch of Asians
So I recently started working at Zooty, fell sick really fast. Been running the bathroom like crazy all week. I don’t even eat anymore, all I do is eat a tablespoon of yogurt when I’m starving till the point of ‘I-cant-take-it-anymore’. Hell-ish days.
Anywho, so since working in Zooty, there’s always Asians dropping in now and then to go downstairs to greet mom. So...
Dreams
So… I seem to be making a lot of appearances in men’s dreams~
First I appeared in Gary’s dream, and this is what he said:
8th March 2011
“Well I was riding mountain bike in the forest next to a lake! U just popped up from out of nowhere. U invited me to ur house, which was next to a lake! Next thing we where making out on ur bed, and rolling around. Then ur mom busted...
Soul Mate
Two words capable of invoking the wildest of fantasies.
As much as I’m against the concept of soulmates. I can’t wait for mine. When I pass my 28th birthday (lunar year count), I’ll be ready to marry him. I’ll be ready to share my life with him.
I wonder what he’s going to be like. Maybe a Leo or Virgo or Capricorn as well? :) I’m already excited about meeting...
Mild Depression
I went to my doctor today, and he diagnosed me with mild depression. I’m so miserable. Over what? Nothing. Over my idiotic mistakes, my shame, my embarrassment, my mistakes, my choices. And I’m stressing myself over all of these. Going to see a psychiatrist sometime at the beginning of May, do some tests, have an analysis.
God, I want to run away. Far away. Just…be away from...
Confirmed
Whatever hopes, and wishes I still harbored for Rocky completely diminished when I heard what his sister had to finally say about him. He’s so sick. SICK. I think he needs to be locked in an asylum and be studied on! He has some sort of disorder. I have nothing more to say about him. Wait, I could literally write a book about him, his constant change of personality, his techniques, tactics...
Normal, Irritation, Depression
I wake up in the mornings, feeling like nothing could ever go wrong, and afternoon comes, I’m mildly irritated… and late afternoon I’m majorly irritated, by nightfall, I reach depression. I shed tears of sorrow. I remember how much I miss Doraemon, I think of how great it’ll feel again to go hand in hand, to travel together, to be happy together again…. I miss...
Summer Fall
My heart thumps laborously
Heavy weight upon me
Sorrow seeps through
I’ve chosen pain and suffering
Summer Fall.
Details
So mother left Nam for a month, I partied hard for the first weekend, and then decided that the party scene didn’t suit me. Henceforth, I didn’t go out so often anymore.
After numerous planning, Rocky and I decide to make a weekend trip to Cape Town. So he said he’ll book the tickets, he did, but had to change the dates, because my VISA wasn’t out yet. Had to run...
February 2011
7 posts
Nervous
I’m a bit nervous about the meeting tomorrow with huge clients, thinking about borrowing Rocky’s Range Rover 2011, ummm that’s if he didn’t mind me yelling at him for an hour last night…. @@ lol~
and the only reason he has this car is because he crashed his previous one for me… so yeah… might be a bit of a controversy. My heart is beating unevenly...
Frustrated
Rocky hasn’t replied to my text or calls the whole of yesterday and today… Is he getting me back for what I’ve done? If it is, then tell me so. Leave me. Don’t make me miserable. I’m hoping he’s somewhere in a hospital unconscious that’s why he cant reply or pick up my calls…. That’s just wishful thinking.
I saw ex today, he had the coldest,...
Overwhelmed
I am overwhelmed with emotions
Walking beneath a light drizzle
Letting the rain wash out my tear stained face
I look for solitude with every step I take
But with every step comes with more chaos
A forked path appears ahead
Which shall I take…
Summer Snow~*
Heartache II
So my periods arrive successfully, Im happy to announce that this is day 5 of my cycle. I miss Rocky exceptionally, there’s nothing I can do to contact him… maybe he’s not even in the country anymore. What makes me angrier is the fact that seeing him, thinking about him, hearing about him has this heart-throbbing effect. I hate being this weak. But I would of liked to share the...
Heartache
I broke up with Rocky today. I cannot handle the fact that we’re both passive. There are certain obligations when you enter into a relationship. Certain things you should know that you should do. If I make the effort to see you, clear my schedule, and you say yes, you’ll be available, and when the time comes, I neither see nor hear where you are. It’s been bothering me, nagging...
Car Accident
I had a pretty much hectic day today, started off with Pascale calling for an appointment after 8:30 in the morning, but I had another client (Mr Lin) to see before being able to leave the office. Mr Lin came in late, past 9. Only got to Pascale at around 9:40, had to postpone my meeting with Willem till 10, and then till 10:15. Pascale gave a lot of good news, mother and aunt them were extremely...
January 2011
8 posts
John, Christoph and Fiki
It was raining when I woke up this morning, a soft constant rhythmical drill. Instead of waking up at 06:20, I lay in bed, listening to the rain until it was 07:00. Did the usuals, and went to Alet’s to deliver her stock. After that I went to work, and it was still drizzling lightly. I left work to say hi to mom and then went to say hi to John, left for Maerua, went to Hamilton &...
Doraemon and Rocky, last night
<p>So D comes over last night, he needed to use my pc, I was in a bad mood when he came due to the whole Rocky incident. When he’s finally done with using the pc, he sits with me in the kitchen (I was busy having dinner), and he asks me what’s wrong. I tell him perhaps of work, and I demand to know what he wants from me. One moment he’s all lovey dovey and the next...
Overly sensitive
Is this what I’ve resolved to? Being overly sensitive and touchy when it comes to him?
Dearest Rocky,
I can longer bear seeing you, being unsure of how I feel… Being constantly in such agony, such longing to be with you. I suppose it has been a while since I’ve felt this way, and I’m taking it harshly, for I am not accustomed to feeling like this. I have truly enjoyed...
John, Pascale, Francois, Rocky
Woke up early this morning, though I tried snoozing a bit, only managed to fully drag myself out of bed around 06:41, brushed my teeth, washed my face and proceeded to put in my color contacts, make up, and applied red mousse to my hair. Mr Lin dropped by, he needed $100 000 loan from mama for his new house. Hmmm I ddnt get a bite of breakfast, I just didnt have the appetite.
I’ve...
John, Braam, Charlene, Morne, Waldo, Rocky
Monday Morning~ we had the longest team meeting ever since I started working, a lot of hand-outs that needed to be signed. Our meeting ended around 10:10, I headed out to see John first, caught him as he was about to go down the escalator :) We cheek-kiss greeted and promised to come back to him later.
Met Braam at his new flat, tiled floors, black and white setting, pretty. Spent more than 2...
Dear John
My BFF, it only works because he’s gay :) which I adore about him. He’s very sympathetic, the only person I’d call when I’m being emotional. We’ve bonded in a close, yet not too close, way. I see him on a constant basis. Oh, and he has the cutest bf too ;) J is Filipino, maybe 1.6m? He’s short, and both our clothing sizes, pants/t-shirts etc are the same ;)...
Louwtjie
He is but too adorable and romantic. He sent me a rose when I was half way across the globe, it came with a card wishing me a Happy New Year and a Happy Birthday, I was ecstatic. However, he’s totally not my type of guy? Our lives are diversely different. If we were to date, it would take a lot work (Im under that impression)…
Rocky
So… after the whole unclean break up with my x, Rocky came in the picture, and so did many others… however, Rocky was the sweetest.
He asked me out, and I declined since I just got out of a relationship. He is undeniably sweet and considerate. We’ve been ‘flinging’ for 3 months now I suppose. And Im afraid our fling is going to end soon… I fear so. I feel it....
September 2009
1 post
